Upheaval both worldwide and personally seems to be running rampant these days. It’s become increasingly difficult to relate to so much chaos with anything but unsettled feelings and angst. Major societal and personal course corrections are being called for on every level including claiming our destiny.
Has your world turned upside down recently? How do you cope with losing your job, health issues and financial difficulties to name a few, or with new relationships, work opportunities, new directions or places to live?
What if you didn’t have to cope and could actually thrive? Could you stop hanging by your fingernails thereby releasing your attachment to confusion and trepidation? Relating to and navigating the white waters of change in new ways can decrease stress while increasing clarity paving the way to boundless joy, peace and ease.
I used to say I loved change until I realized I only loved the change I initiated being much less thrilled with unexpected changes. When confronted with surprising change, do you focus on what you’ll lose believing that what is ahead will be worse than what you have now?
When the pain of loss arises, do you quickly attempt to avoid it at all costs even though those costs are huge? Efforts to block the grieving process manifest as resistance, also known as the many faces of fear, i.e., control, stubbornness, procrastination, negativity, busyness/constant motion, excuses, and attachment to misery, only serve to deepen the discomfort. Sending the pain underground will, at some point, cause an unexpected eruption leaving you and those around you confused and astounded.
So, how can these fears morph into excitement? Some things that have worked for me are:
1. Remembering that fear, an acronym for Failure to Experience Actual Reality, is always future based and a lie. Returning to the current moment, ask what is right about this I’m not getting?
2. Lovingly embracing those feelings as I allow them to surface and gratefully honoring what is being released.
3. Realizing the outcomes of the many transitions I’ve experienced have always taken me to places filled with more gifts and bliss than I ever imagined.
4. Knowing there are no right or wrong decisions, only choices I make with available information. As I follow my chosen path, more data is gathered guiding my further choices including needed course corrections. Nothing is forever and I am always at choice.
5. Increasing my faith, peace and connection with my soul through journaling, walking meditation on the labyrinth, and spending time in nature.
6. Remembering that all changes are invitations to living more delightfully from my authentic self and purpose.
7. Acknowledging that the gifts I’ve received from the people, places and things of my past will always be with me to lift my spirits and support my next steps.
Limbo and the Field of All Possibilities
Our culture has great difficulty with being in limbo. Remember the infamous 2000 presidential election? While the country lived in limbo for five weeks waiting for the election outcome, the widespread discomfort was palpable. Confusion and blame were rampant as politicians and the media tried to fill the void. Do you see some similarities with our current political climate?
The most effective way to relate to the limbo experience is to get still, go within and listen. The temptation to move into high gear to make something happen provides the perfect distraction to bury those uncomfortable feelings. A painting in my home says “Don’t push the river, it will flow at its own pace.” To me, this is the message of this process. Slow down, listen and feel the rhythm – your rhythm, the rhythm of the changes that are occurring – trusting that all will unfold in perfected timing and that you are fully supported.
Connecting with your deepest desires guides you to enjoy this time of spaciousness. Deepak Chopra calls the void “the field of all possibilities” – the richest, most creative place there is. Your desires are your soul’s longings – they provide guidance for you. The soul communicates with you through your feelings –the light feelings reflect you soul’s truth, while the heavy feelings reflect the lies you tell yourself. Allowing yourself to partake of the luxury, no, the necessity, of the creative gifts available during this time is self-nurturing of the highest order.
New beginnings bring excitement, inspiration, and discombobulating stress. The wonder of newness and uncharted waters is both exhilarating and scary. New places, people, skills, and experiences serve to stretch and challenge us to become more of who we really are. Continuing to move toward the essence of our dreams, without attachment to the timing or form they might take, invites new beginnings to unfold beyond our wildest imaginings.
While the change process appears linear here, it is truly much more fluid. Grief can be dancing with flashes of creativity as glimpses of possible new beginnings arise. Participating fully with the changes we face by allowing whatever comes up to flow through us with as little resistance as possible guarantees an incredible ride. We have chosen to live in these exciting, unsettling times. The disappearance of external anchors that used to keep us afloat is urging us to find our source of potency, joy and clarity within ourselves. All that was nailed down is coming loose so we can stand in our truth, fly with spirit and steer with our hearts!